A letter to an annoying man.

Hi there sir,

Your pointless jabbering is hurting my ears please shut up. That woman, your with, what do you want with her? Is she your date, or your girlfriend? And why do you think sayings something "isn't a sexist thing" makes it not a sexist thing. If you hadn't said that it wasn't then nobody would think that it was because you wouldn't have drawn attention to it. But you did say it, and unless it was actually sexist, you just made it sexist. If it was sexist to begin with then you did not make it any less sexist by claiming that it wasn't sexist. This is a vicious circle, and no, you shan't escape. That is all I have to tell you, now go drink your coffee somewhere else, and

HAVE A NICE FUCKING DAY!

Terri

P.S. You are fat and old and your glasses make you look pretentious, also your conceited. That is all. 

Some reasons why my sister is awesome.

It's funny cause I'm writing this blog post with my sister, Joanna, sitting across from me. Any I'm feeling affectionate towards my sister today so i'ma write her a post. I was gonna make this a numbered post, but I really don't feel like living it so close ended... & here we go!

She just baby sat my computer for an hour (50 mins) when I went to class.

She talks more than anyone I know, expect maybe myself and right now she is reading to herself.

She keeps me grounded, i.e. pointing out when I'm being completely stupid and ridiculous.

She's wont answer any of my questions so I have to answer them myself.

She's pretty much the smartest person I know (sorry).

She gets all my really bad jokes, and the good ones, she also understands my ridiculous sense of humour.

She likes the same stuff that I do, same movies, same TV, same music, most of the time.

She likes cupcakes. Enough said.

We're going to start a potato collective. We also have many other crazy ideas.

As well as being super smart, she also has a really good sense of style.

She understands why I like farmville. Cute animals, I swear.

She's the only person I trust to give me the most honest advice and to critique stuff for me, because of said honesty.

She's basically my best friend.

Ten things I know are true

This blog post is inspired by this girl: http://www.ted.com/talks/sarah_kay_if_i_should_have_a_daughter.html
Sarah Kay, her spoken word poetry is amazing! I still haven't tried spoken word cause I have stage fright, but I'd really like to. I enjoyed how much energy Sarah has when she talks and how passionate and funny she is. She's a real personality and inspiration. If you watch her video she talks about "ten things I know are true" lists, as you all know I really like writing lists so I'ma write my own ten things I know are true list. Here we go:

1. Kittens are always cute. Even ugly kittens. Always and forever.

2. Nature is the planet. We need to stop destroying it.

3. I am going to travel the world. This is a fact, I've already decided.

4. I am completely fascinated by revolutions and dictatorships, simply because I cannot comprehend it.

5. I am ridiculously naive.

6. Family. Always true for me.

7. I am completely addicted to farmville. I don't know why. The animals are just soooo cute!

8. I will one day learn to drive and have a motorcycle, just don't tell my mom.

9. I have made writing a part of me and I need to learn to maintain distance in some instances.

10. Me. I'm completely true, everything about me, every hypocritical and honest thing I say is true to me.

So there's my list, now I'd like to see yours!

If you were wondering...this is how my brain works.

So I'm eating dinner at my grandparents, BBQ Pork chops, BBQ potatoes, cauliflower and corn (I know, random meal info). My grandma insists that I take the smaller, but fatter and boneless pork chop, so I do. I'm sitting there eating it and here is my though process:

Looks a bit pink (picks at meat a bit and continues eating)
Probably just a little under-cooked, oh well (continues eating)
I guess grandma was just being nice by not giving me the bone
OR
Maybe they knew this piece was under-cooked and they thought to give it to me because my immune system is better and I'm less likely to die!
Yeah, that's probably it.

That is all. I don't know how to write stream-of-conscious and make it make sense so you get this weird quasi version instead (yay).

Also it's earth hour tonight! Ya'll should remember that and TURN OFF YOUR LIGHTS! (8:30-9:30). Please don't wimp out and turn off *some* of the lights, or like, the lights but not the computer and TV, cause that is just not cool.

Anyway this is all i've got for now, I had this epic rant about how annoying clubs can be, which I mentally planned out when I was at the club wasted, but sadly most of it was lost in the depths of my drunk (now sober) brain, so I'm not gonna write it. Also it seems like less of a good idea now... for obvious reasons. 

Movie trailer obsession

For some reason I have a strange obsession with watching movie trailers. I realize that doesn't sound that weird, but I just tend to watch the trailers and rarely ever get around to actually going and seeing any of the movies. This is partly due to the fact some of them don't play here and partly that I get so tired of seeing the trailer and hearing about the movie I stop having and desire to see it.

I also have a strange system in going about picking which movies trailers I want to watch. I usually look at apple trailers and just skim through and pick all of the movies with the most interesting look posters and titles, usually I can guess what sort of movie they will be based on this. After I watch the trailer I'll read the synopsis, IF I liked it, otherwise I move on. Comingsoon.net is also great for movie trailers.

Anyway since I'm tired and I can't force myself to concentrate on marxism right now I'm gonna review some trailers!

(In no particular order)

Miral

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/weinstein/miral/
Genre:Drama, Foreign
Director:Julian Schnabel
Cast:Hiam Abbass, Frieda Pinto, Omar Metwally

Appears to be about a girl who gets the opportunity to be educated, but then decides she wants to rebel, but instead of the regular teenage rebellious behaviour she joins a terrorist group! Yay, that'll make mom and dad proud! It appears that she gets caught, falls in love and is shunned by her family and school mistress, but I could be wrong. Anyway it looks interesting, but I probably wouldn't see it, seems like another pretty girl being tricked into a bad situation by a man she loves. Did I mention she's 17 and he's like, old? Ick. I must say though, I do really enjoy the poster, very intriguing and the political aspects of the movie do interest me, I just don't really like the girls character.

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/weinstein/miral/
Genre: Drama, Foreign
Director: Julian Schnabel
Cast: Hiam Abbass, Frieda Pinto, Omar Metwally

The Collector

Link:  http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/thecollector/
Genre: Drama
Director: Darian Lane
Cast: Kate Siegel, Rudolf Martin, Alexander Greer, George Frazier, Jamie Elvy

This movie looks terrible. Or it could be great. Either way I'm pretty sure it's a love story about this chick that "collects" guys, I guess cause she's super hot n'shit, whatever, bored already. Anyway the trailer basically shows nothing about what the movie is about, she has a brother, she lives in miami, she has a shitty job, she has a car, oh and look! She likes to make out with a lot of guys, then stand around in skimpy outfits at art galleries... yeah probs wont see this one either, I don't even know what I watched it cause the poster isn't even interesting.

Water for Elephants

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/fox/waterforelephants/
Genre: Drama
Director: Francis Lawrence
Cast: Reese Witherspoon, Robert Pattinson, Christoph Waltz

This one I actually really want to see, it just looks cute and magical and shit. Okay it does also look pretty cheesy, whatevs it's about the circus and it has reese witherspoon and Robert Pattinson, whom I maybe, possibly have a crush on. I know he can't really act and he was in Twilight which basically ruins his career as a serious actor, but he's still a babe, okay! (and yes I realize the only people whom agree are 12 girls :( ). I also realized after I started watching the trailer I've already seen it like half a dozen times... which is weird that I forgot the title.

When Harry Tries To Marry

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/whenharrytriestomarry/
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director: Nayan Padrai
Cast: Rahul Rai, Freishia Bomambehran, Stefanie Estes

The poster looks pretty cheesy, but the name intrigued me, an obvious play on "When Harry Met Sally". The movie looks cute and predicable, I like the twist of the son wanting an arranged marriage, interesting social implications there. I don't think I'd go out of my way to see this, but it still looks intriguing.

Hanna

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/focus_features/hanna/
Genre: Action and Adventure
Director: Joe WrightCast:Saoirse Ronan, Eric Bana, Cate Blanchett, Tom Hollander, Olivia Williams, Jason Flemyng
Writers: Seth Lochhead, David Farr

This looks interesting. The beginning was sorta creepy and awesome, then it turned into a regular sorta action movie. The young girl has been trained by her father (an ex-CIA agent) to be an assassin and is sent off to kill a woman, who I imagine will be her mother, or have some surprising connection to the main character, cause that's how these movies work. I doubt I'd go see it, but I might watch it online or something, I always like strong feel leads, especially in action movies.

The Bang Bang Club

Genre:Action and Adventure
Director:Steven Silver
Cast:Ryan Phillippe, Malin Akerman, Taylor Kitsch

This looks awesome. It's about four combat photographers who are in South Africa and they're photographing in the first free election in post Apartheid South Africa in the early 90s. I have to say I love movies about Africa for some reason... okay I'm lying I loved Hotel Rwanda, but still this looks good and the guys are babes, no reason not to see it :). Also I think they don't make enough movies about photographers, I guess making a movie about a guy who spends all of his time at the beach taking pretty pictures would be dull, but I'm sure there are some personalities out there they could make movies about!

The Princess of Montpensier

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/theprincessofmontpensier/
Genre: Action and Adventure, Drama, Foreign
Director: Bertrand Tavernier
Cast: Melanie Thierry, Lambert Wilson, Gaspard Ulliel, Gregoire Leprince-Ringuet, Raphael Personnaz

The post for this one intruiged me cause I like historical fictions. The movie looks terrible though, it probably could have been good in the right hands, but it appears to be about a girl who's in love with one guy and is forced to marry another. Sorta reminds me of The Duchess, expect this is the french version. It also appears to have the French's favourite cinematic topic in it: sex. And a lot of it. That's all great and dandy, IF the movie has a good plot line. The only reason I would see it is because it's about the Protestant/catholic war, which could be kinda neat, but otherwise the trailer looks boring.

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/snowflowerandthesecretfan/
Genre: Drama
Director: Wayne Wang
Writers: Ron Bass, Angela Workman, Michael Ray

This looks really cool! It's about two best friends who aren't just best friends throughout one life time, but throughout a bunch! There is also a book, which I want to read now. It does have the potential to be pretty cheesy, but from what I gleaned from the trail it looks to beautiful not to watch, I'd just see it for the cinematography, costumes and sets.

Queen To Play

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/queentoplay/
Genre: Comedy, Romance, Foreign
Director: Caroline Bottaro
Cast: Sandrine Bonnaire, Kevin Kline, Jennifer Beals, Valerie Lagrange, Francis Renaud

This looks cute-ish. It's about a woman who decides to play chess. Then there's all this drama cause her family doesn't want her too. I don't get it either. Chess, seriously? I'm possibly missing something or this movie just has a really strange premise. Anyway, def wouldn't see it and I'm also missing the part where it's a 'romance' I saw no romance happening in that trailer...maybe they gave to much to The Princess of Montpensier, who knows :P.

The Vintner's Luck

Links: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/thevintnersluck/
Genre:Drama, Romance
Director:Niki Caro
Cast:Jérémie Renier, Keisha Castle-Hughes, Vania Vilers, Eric Godon, Patrice Valota, François Beukelaers, Gaspard Ulliel, Stephane Garneau, Juliette Mariotte, Finn Van Mell, Charlotte Cheveau, Felicity-Amore Castle-Hughes, Julie Berthoux, Vera Farmiga, Jean-Louis Sbille

This one looks different and I want to see it! It's about a wine maker who meets a fallen angel who inspires him. I know that sounds strange, but it doesn't look that bad, really! I just like the scenery etc, can't help it that I'm hella visual! And the chick from Whale-Rider plays his wife :).

The Desert of Forbidden Art

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/thedesertofforbiddenart/
Genre:Documentary
Director:Tchavdar Georgiev, Amanda Pope

I immediately clicked on this when I saw the Soviet flag, even though I don't really watch documentaries that much. I just have a weird fascination with the USSR. This looks really really cool! It's about all of the art work which was banned durning the reign of the soviets! Some of it is stunning. All modernist looking art work (don't quote me on that I don't know what I'm talking about). I love art, and am fascinated with the USSR so I definitely want to see this one!

Heartbeats

Link: http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/heartbeats/
Genre: Comedy, Romance
Director: Xavier DolanCast:Xavier Dolan, Monia Chokri, Neils Schneider

This looks sort of okay... kind of just another indie love story... a love triangle non-the-less. But the clothing! BEAUTIFUL! I just about died when I saw that purple dress! Love 60's fashion :). And the girl's Audrey-Hepburn-Breakfast-At-Tiffany's do, Win! Also love Audrey Hepburn. I'd just see this movie for that, oh and not to mention the guys awesome stick-up-edward-esque hair, so great :P.

I was gonna post reviews of more trailers, but I just realized how long this already is, so ima stop posting them now. Maybe I'll do another post in the future, this was kinda fun!

A sad fact.

Since being in university for the past 2 and a half years (give or take) I have yet to receive an A on any major papers for any class! This has been something which has eaten away at me so much that I would wonder what the point was if I couldn't even write a decent paper. I know someone out there is cringing and going 'grades aren't everything!' but when your an English major AND you want to be a writer its a real slap in the face to have comments like 'doesn't have a good grasp on the English language' (which I still think is untrue, I just have a bad grasp on grammar). Yeah, ouch, real disheartening.

Last semester was the worst for this. I took a modernist British novel class, which was swains and I loved, but I couldn't seen to get the papers quite right. The final paper ended up being a complete disaster. My topic was terrible and I basically spent three days editing the paper, and only got a c+. Considering I edited that paper more than any other and yeah...:( looking back I realize I should have changed my topic, and started it earlier so I could've hit up the writing centre or Kirstie and/or Raya. Now I know better and received a grade I feel like I DESERVE!

Thankfully I'm basically feeling better about everything cause this is actually a pretty hard class (for me) and I thought I was gonna fail it, for a moment there. That just, like, made my day n'shit :). So far this week is a million times better than last week, now if I only do this well on my the English paper ima get back tomorrow! Fingers crossed, but it's unlikely, that one was written the day before :S.

Yay it's Friday, time for a happy things list!

K
Horrible week, NOTHING went the way I expected it to, but whatever the week is ending and i'ma try and cheer up cause things are about to get disgusting with school, ie paper writing/exam season! YAY! :(

People sharing your blog :)

Evelina by Frances Burney

Meeting random cute boys at the bus stop

Alt. rock/90s grunge/punk

Creative non-fiction essay

Buns

Sleeeeeeeeeeep...

Having religious debates with people when we're supposed to be studying...

Gray days

People getting mad at inanimate objects

Finnerty's

Writing these lists

Blaine and Kurt! <3

Sundresses

Burger blog!

There were some more, but I don't remember cause i'm much to hungover/tired, also doing the minimalist list thing again, I like it better this way, leaves some questions :P

Essays, writing, and such

I think about writing a lot. It's kind of a problem, because sometimes I really don't care about anything else. And today, I realized something sad. The topic I like to write about the most is me. I wish this was otherwise or I enjoyed writing other things, but I don't. There are a couple of factors which contribute to this fact. First, I often feel as if I don't have the authority to write about other people or to write certain genres because I'm not a "good enough writer yet", or it's just to much work. Writing this, is not work to me. It is pure enjoyment. Maybe some people will say that is wrong, that writing should always be hard, but I don't believe that, I don't think that it has to be hard all the time. Writing the first thing which pops into your head is awesome and relaxing, maybe not always the best results, but its good for you.

The second thing, as a student, I spend a lot of time writing for other people about things I don't always care that much about. I hate to confess this, but honestly, I don't give a fuck what Burney's views, as displayed in Evelina, were about classes or gender relations. Honest, I don't. This is why I have chosen writer over professor for my first choice career.

Another thing I have to had here about my writing and me (sorry that sounds like a bad self-help book) is that I think I'm WAAAAAY to passionate about it, and no-where near talented or skilled enough in it (yet!) to justify this. It worries me. It makes me fall down harder than I should, which is a problem because I am definitely a bottler (as in I bottle things up) I tend to only portray part of myself to the world, the part I think they should see. This is because I spend most of my time inside my own head and do it unintentionally and because it's a lot easier to pretend sometimes, even necessary.

Okay I was just intending to take a quick break from a paper and definitely got distracted and wrote waaaaaaay more than I meant too (apologies for the emphasized waaaaaay, I just needed to get that out of my system :P). Now I go back to writing about Ghost Writer, which is awesome btw and you'll should read it. The essay inspired this post. Tootles for now lovelies.

Noise

I'm sitting here watching TV with my grandparent's, and I noticed that my grandmother has her hand in an awkward position against the side of her head, as if she was cupping something...

I realized, as she turned up the TV to a nice, loud, can-hear-through-the-whole-house volume, that she can't hear the TV very well. This almost had the ability to shock me, yet it didn't, I simply wondered how shocked she would be coming to my moms house and hearing how low we keep our volume in comparison.

Both my grandparents are hard of hearing, yet my grandfather is the only one with a hearing aid. He hates it. My grandmother declares she will not get one. How does one go about forcing someone to do something they really are set against? I don't know.

I wish I could explain what it's like living with old people, it can be awesome because they are so kind and understanding, but awful because they just don't get it, they don't get me. I sometimes feel like we're different species, well we are at least from a different era. That sounds so terribly emo, but it's so very true in my case, both them and me are to polite and cautious to behave in our usual manner, you could even say to mild I suppose.

I feel bad complaining, because as I sit here, watching my grandmother with her hand cupped around her ear, I'm watching coverage from Japan, the misery, destruction, pain, hope, and humanity of it all. I realize everyone is blogging about this, but I feel like it's not something I can ignore. I'm scared for those people and amazed by their strength, I'm angry at their government for withholding information, but I see the point, I don't understand and I don't want to be there, but I feel bad about it.

I want to know what happened to Arisa Suzuki, an exchange student who stayed with my family in the spring of 2009. I don't know what happened to her, she lived in Natori, I know that many other people with exchange students don't know what happened to their students either and there are many exchange students who don't know what happened to their families. I just, I want to know!

A mystery guitar man (with glasses)

Lately, I have put my love life on the back burner completely. I just have to many other commitments to even care about it, but then there are some days I kinda wish I hadn't. Days like today. When a perfectly friendly, nice looking stranger attempts to amuse and make conversation with you. I actually feel pretty bad for the guy, not only did I shoot down his efforts at conversation, I also made him miss the bus. And as any singleton knows, even one who has decided to set aside their love-life for the present, there is always a little regret involved when you reject someone unintentionally, no matter how unlikely the outcome of pursuit may have been. There is always that moment of WHAT WAS I THINKING! He had guitar AND glasses! Truly! What was I thinking???? Oh well there's always next week on the bus...so much for putting my love-life on hold...

Mystery-glasses-guitar-man, know, that just for a moment I may have been interested in you and know that I will always wonder what may have happened. As I will wonder what happened with so many other men I dared not pursue.

YAY!

I had a semi-job interview today, I guess you could call it a meeting of some sort. It was for a news paper and magazine company in my home town, I wasn't sure what to expect, but I ended up with much more than I bargained for! The editor asked me what I was interested, I of course, immediately said writing. She offered me the choice to write some pieces for the paper to help build my portfolio! :D I am soooo pleased and sooooo nervous! She wants a reporter, a real-life journalist, I don't know if I can deliver or not, since I've never done this before! Gah! So nervy about writing it! My first article I mean. I want it to be perfect and for her to LOVE me, because she was so amazing and nice the entire time. Okay amazing is a little bit of an overstatement, but she knows her shit, I can see that and she's trying to do something which she loves, which I really admire. She also seemed pleased when I said I knew there was no money in the business I am choosing, she seemed to realize how passionate I am about it when I said that. At least I hope that she did. I really need to think of an amazing article to write and I want to get it to her for next week! Eeeeeeeeeck! I know I can do this, it's just super nerve racking for me! But I figure if she gives me a reference next year I can get a job at a paper that is a little larger, such as the Martlet! (which I am definitely going to pursue because I need the experience). Okay bed time, dunno if i'ma sleep though, way to wound up!

My neglected poetry

Last year poetry was my big thing. I wrote tons of poetry for months, and loved writing it. Mind you, most of it sorta sucked, it I like writing in that manner. I just wanna say a couple of things about my poetry before ya'll start criticizing me for it. I tend to write with a lot of random line breaks, not very much rhyme and no meter. Why? because it's boring. Okay, it isn't actually, but I really just don't like that stuff, when I write about something I want to just say it. I am just starting accept punctuation :S. Basically, I think the words are the most important part, so that's what I tend to focus on. Anyway this was all leading up to a poem I'm writing just for you! Hope you like it, feel free to say whatever you think, I love the feedback :)

The Delicate Flower

We named it the Delicate Flower,
my sister and I.

Blue and silver, dented and chipped all over,
nothing flower like.

The black, plastic, screen stares out at me,
lacking its former pixels.

I can remember holding it in my hand,
the plastic was always warm in my hand, sweaty even.

The hidden keys became popular with use and gain black spots,
and the letters slowly disappearing with the days.

The frustration when I wouldn't get a text,
when the body split apart with a snap and the screen black.

I dropped you, so many many many times,
so you began to drop my calls.

(can you guess yet?)

Such a silly thing, to be attached to a phone,
yet the only way to talk.